A proud mom

DD has completed her master's degree program! I couldn't remember when she started it, but she said just a month over 2 years ago. Boy, that seemed to go by so fast. But, she is so glad to be done with it. No more studying, LOL. She can have some time to herself to enjoy, again. I'm sure this degree will give her lots of opportunities to move her career forward, but for now she just wants to stay in her current job, which she just had her 4 year work anniversary with. I think for at least the next while, she just wants to relax a bit and not take on anything new related to work. Building a house will be her next focus. But right now she's just looking forward to getting comfy on the couch with a book or watching some tv.

My uncle texted me yesterday about 6:15 that he's having trouble getting a hold of mom on the phone the past couple of days, is everything ok? I said yep...you just can't try to call when she's at dinner, LOL (he's an hour earlier so probably isn't really paying attention what time it is here). I told him she usually heads downstairs around 4:30 and isn't usually back until a little after 6 and then she's in her bathroom for 5 or 10 minutes, so wait until after 6:30 to call.

If we get trick or treater's at all, it will just be the 2 little goblins from down the street. We ended up eating the first bag of candy I bought (trying to make sure I bought it early and didn't procrastinate), so I had to buy a 2nd bag, LOL. Hopefully they will be stopping by, because we do NOT need to eat another bag! I just texted neighbor. She said she is driving the boy into the city, where his little sis is at daycare and they will be trick or treating that neighborhood, but she will stop by our house on their way out. 

Well off to do a work meeting to get trained on a new order system. fun..not!

More relaxing on tap

I was able to relax yesterday, which was nice. The weather was sunny and got up into the 50's. Dh decided to get one last lawn mowing in for the year. Then he got the small lawn mower serviced and put away until next year. He ran out of steam to do the riding lawn mower, so he'll have to do it's annual maintenance another day.

I've apparently strained or really something in the back of my right calf. It's happened before. Our backyard lawn is super steep going down to the bottom level and I'm not sure if it's the walking down or back up, but seems to always pull that calf when I do. But, it usually is fine in a couple days. Well, a couple weeks ago when out looking for the cat who wouldn't come back and it was getting dark I went up and down twice that day. My calf hasn't stopped hurting (when I walk or try to stretch it) since. It doesn't hurt if I'm not using it. Google it and home remedy says to not use it and ice it every 2 hours, so I spent most of the day just trying not to use it as much as possible and will do the same today (along with ice every so often) and see if I can get this healed up. Or then I read use heat, so not sure which to use at this point. It's getting annoying. Dh took the cat upstairs to bed for me last night and this morning, instead of my usual make my coffee, go upstairs and blog etc for a bit, then go back downstairs to make dh's morning egg sandwich, I just made his sandwich while I was making my coffee, so one less use of the stairs.

Yesterday morning with watching mom on the camera was pretty funny. It's shower day/morning and after she came back up from breakfast she went and sat in her recliner and was dozing off when about half hour later K comes in and says "I'm here to get you in the shower". Mom says "wellll.....I'd rather just do it in the morning". K says "it is morning! and your daughter said we need to do it today (I told her to use me if she gets any pushback, as it might help) and then mom says "oh she did, did she? well ok then" and off they went to do the shower. LOL. Whatever works! I'm also thinking the new style of shower head on the hose was easier for K to help her with, as her shower went much quicker than the previous two.

Well, of to see how long I can plant my butt in the recliner and stay off my leg. Seems like I'm always having to get up for something.

 

Ready to relax

I had a pretty good afternoon off yesterday. I stopped at Home Depot and picked up the new shower head I had ordered online for store pick up. I got up to mom's apartment just after 12:30, so that gave me enough time to install it (easy peasy) and make sure it worked ok. Then I refilled her meds in the dispenser. Then I looked in her fridge to find a whole bunch of containers of partially eaten food. They are in these kind of nice green containers that come from the kitchen. They seem too nice to throw away. I texted K with a picture of one and asked "do you know if these containers are supposed to be returned?" and she texted right back and said she had that same question and asked and they said to just set the containers out on the table in the common area, so I set them out, where someone else had put a couple. 

Then I noticed she had her tv all unplugged again! Then in one of her kitchen drawers (along with normal kitchen stuff) I found one bra and one pair of underwear! K had mentioned a week or so ago she had found her do this, so what her brain is thinking on this one I have no idea! By the time she returned from lunch just after 1pm, I had every thing I wanted to do done, so I was glad of that. She comes walking in...in her white shorts...and slippers! I said "whatcha got shorts on for mom?" She kind of laughs and says "oh I don't know, the other people were commenting on it too". I said well lets get a pair of your jeans on, so you won't be cold when you go back down for dinner. It's only 40 degrees outside". She also on her own got out a pair of socks and put on her tennis shoes. While she did that I took her garbage out, to get rid of all the food I dumped into it and set those containers on the table in the common area.

I had brought my hair cutting scissors and gave her hair a little trim. She has always done this herself. She actually cut my hair for many years and did a good job. I am not good at it, but now her bangs were no more and almost as long as the rest of her short hair. I think she looks better with bangs, so I gave her some bangs back, haha and trimmed a bit around the sides and back. We spent the rest of the hour just visiting. It was pretty much just an hour of continuous loop of the same conversation. "So, how are you guys doing?" I'd reply and try to think of something to tell her about. Then it was "so, how are you guys doing?". I can't tell you how many times I was asked that question. I was really in no big hurry as to when I needed to leave, but around 2:15 pm she then kind of says "oh, I'm so glad you stopped by" so I took that as my cue to take my leave. 

I went over to Subway and got dh and I each a sandwich to bring home for dinner. I had the cooler with me for the groceries, so I put them in there. The reason I went there before picking up groceries is due to the location. To leave Subway and head in the direction of home I'd have to get across lanes of busy traffic, which is almost impossible, so I went first and then was able to turn out of Subway easily and go to the store. Then I went to the store to pick up my grocery order. Still liking this store better at least for the no wait time. Again, they brought out my order in less than 5 minutes. I just need to get better about marking what I'm willing to have a substitution on.

I'm enjoying my quiet relaxing Saturday morning, drinking my coffee, puttering around the internet and not having to get ready to spend half the day going to the city and back. I'm pretty sure a nap is in my schedule today.

Half day, yay!

I'm up a little earlier today, since I'm only working until 11:30 and figure I may as well get started working. My plan is to leave home about 11:30 and stop in Home Depot and pick up the shower head I ordered. Then get to mom's place around 12:40 and see if I can get it installed before she gets back to apartment from lunch. I'm not going to call her this morning and tell her I'm coming. I don't want/need 4 phone calls about it while I'm trying to work.

I had to call her to remind her to go down to lunch yesterday and realized she had laid her clock/calendar down flat but she didn't set it back up. A little after 4:30 I was watching to see if she was awake from her nap and then to make sure she'd go down for dinner and saw the clock was still laying down on her desk, so I called to remind her about dinner time. I tried to get her to stand the clock back upright (there's a little stand that flips out on the back) but she wasn't understanding, so I texted K and asked her to please have the other caregiver (who's on duty for a few days) please set it back upright when she comes after dinner to do mom's meds, and she did. I saw mom ended up falling asleep in her recliner early evening and then got up around 9:30. I thought she was getting ready for bed, but she came back out of her bedroom and had changed from her jeans to a pair of white shorts...and then proceeded to turn the lights off and back to her recliner, where she slept all night. Then she was up at 6:30 this morning walking around with one hand on her back. Yes, I'm sure her back does hurt! It's now 8:02 am and she's still not dressed or ready to go down for breakfast. I'm sure the gal stopped in to remind her a little while ago, but she's off in her own world again. And for this morning, I'll just need to let it be and let the caregiver handle it, that's her job, so I can do mine. And she did take care of it and got mom down for breakfast, but not with the same level of paying attention as I know K would have. K would have paid attention that it was the same top and most likely would have gotten her to change into pants and not shorts (when it's 40 degrees out, LOL)

Last night we had a good dinner of baked salmon and green beans. I wanted to heat up some texas toast, but the salmon cooks at a different temperature than the toast, so I didn't make the toast. That is when a double oven would be nice to have, haha. I'm sure I could have made the toast first and kept it warm, but after working all day I wasn't in the mood to figure it all out. The salmon was good, though. And one of my food items to start eating more of, in my quest for healthier brain food.

I think I have dd's birthday presents completed, other than making her the peanut butter cookies, which of course I won't do until I'm ready to send out that day. I got her the "journal" she can write in and keep track of things when they start building their house, some coffee pods (to take to work), and a big bag of Ghiradelli chocolate.

Ok, well, I'm going to go down and get myself showered and ready. I'm wearing long pants today, not shorts 😄

Almost Friday

I got payroll done fairly quickly yesterday and emailed the report to my boss to review by 9:40am...then I waited and waited. Then I see she went unavailable status for awhile. Then I waited some more and she emailed me at noon about something else, so I figured she was getting back to her emails. I messaged her at 12:20...and still no reply. 2:30 rolls around (which is 3:30 my time and an hour before I finish up for the day) and she starts emailing me about other stuff, so I again forward the payroll report, thinking ok, maybe it got lost in her emails. She always does this to me, LOL.

Mom had a much better day yesterday. She was out of her apt all morning and through lunch and came back after lunch with some snacks and sat down to eat those and watched some tv for awhile. Much more normal activity going on with her now. She appears to have even got herself up, dressed, and down to breakfast this morning. That hasn't happened in a couple weeks.

Our small town/county newspaper is just a small weekly thing. We have on occasion bought a copy at the store (I think it's like 75 cents) and dh sometimes will read articles on their website, but they are like a lot of newspaper publications, they will only allow you to read so many. So, we decided to get a subscription to the newspaper. The printed version will be mailed to us weekly and dh will have unlimited access to their online content - cost of $32 a year.

I was really hoping that lady from the senior care home I want to get on the waiting list for would have called me back, so I can set up a time to do a tour and was hoping I could do it Friday afternoon (tomorrow) but she hasn't. I was thinking of taking the afternoon off work to go in, do this, see mom (get her shower head installed) and pick up groceries. Or just work all day as normal and go do it Saturday. I think I'm leaning towards taking the afternoon off, but I'd best be deciding here in the next few hours, so I can let my boss know.

Still nothing going on with the guy and his 2 lots next door. Haven't even seen him drive in/by in his pickup. Their house for sale is on almost day 400 and they only reduced the price once, last July. I also keep looking to see if by a miracle he's listed these lots for sale, but no such luck yet. But, at least we should have quiet between now and spring, because it's too late in the year to start anything on it now, anyway.

Ok, I'm going to only work a half day tomorrow. That will be nice to get the mom visit and grocery pick up done and then have the weekend for myself. And I'm not telling mom I'm coming. I'm going to get there while she's still at lunch in the dining room and try to get that shower head installed without her in the way, LOL. As far as I can tell it *should* just be a matter of unscrewing the current shower head and screwing in the new one. I'm going with a bit nice handheld one that attaches back up via magnet. Quick and easy to set back up. I'm just ordering it from Home Depot to pick up in store tomorrow.

Wednesday good things

Mom sure slept in yesterday! I suck at knowing what I should do. Like it was noon...should I just let her keep sleeping or call and see if I can get her up and about? I decided to just let her sleep, since she's obviously still trying to get over the cold/cough. She got up around 12:30. Piddled around for about 40 minutes around her apartment, and then she got dressed. And then she went downstairs and got something from the snack bar. Then she left her apartment again later afternoon and didn't come back until after dinner. I messaged dd that it appears she got some of her "zippity do dah" back. I heard K tell her she's going to do her shower in the morning and I see she came in this morning, woke mom up (who thankfully slept all night this time) and got her right in the shower. It's 9:45 and she still hasn't come back from breakfast, so she must have found some activity to get involved in.

My cat doesn't even hang out with me in my office anymore, LOL. DH set this soft fleece blanket on the chair next to his desk (I have same set up in my office) and cat his decided he likes that spot better and sleeps there most of the day. Traitor, LOL.

When our friends from Texas visited over Labor Day weekend they had driven through Yellowstone Park and got dh this nice photograph art of a wolf. I found a frame for it online that I was very pleasantly surprised at the quality of it for the price, under $40 for a 16x20 frame. It looks really nice in dh's den, over his desk. 

We have a revised payroll system that started last payroll, that I figured out after a bit. Well, I go to do payroll this morning and one of the menu options is missing. I really tried to figure it out on my own. Went back to watch the help video on the new format, but still couldn't figure out why it was missing. So, I emailed my payroll advisor, only to find she's out of the office. So, I called to get help from someone else and after being on hold a half hour, this person fixes my issue and explained what I need to do to avoid this problem going forward. It sounds like many people are doing the same thing I did.

We had a little bit of snow this morning. Didn't snow long enough or stick around, but a sign of what's to come.

Worries

It's wonderful to have one worry off my plate (dh's prostate cancer) for now, since my "mom worry" seems to be amping up. I had emailed that care home that K recommended to inquire how I go about getting on their waiting list, but no reply. I hate people that can't reply. I'll give it another day and then call about it. Well, speak of the devil - I no sooner typed that out, then I got an email from the care home owner, with some info. She only has 9 beds, so sounds like probably a long waiting list, but best to be prepared.

I'm hoping this week my mom is able to get back into her routine a little better and not be as forgetful and confused as she seems to have increased during last week when she had the cold and had to stay in her apartment. Sunday I had to call her twice to remind/tell her to go down for lunch. She was taking a long nap and still asleep at 5 minutes to noon. I called and woke her up (all groggy of course) to remind her it was time to go down to eat lunch. She gets off the phone and goes to the bathroom, comes back out and sits back down. So, I called again and said "do you feel like going down for lunch today?" she said "oh sure, I'll do that. Do I need money for it?" Sigh....yesterday, just before noon she was napping in her recliner but woke up, got up for a minute or so and then sat back down. So, I had to call again to remind her it's time to go down for lunch. She didn't seem to even know how to read her digital clock/calendar. I said "it's time to go down for lunch!" she said "oh what time is it...it says 2022". I said that's the year, the time is above that. She said she didn't see a time. Then she finally saw it said 12:02 so I said Yep! you better get down there so you can eat lunch!. She did go right down then.

Monday morning K went in to make sure she was up and getting ready to go down for breakfast. It was 7:40 when she stopped in and mom was still asleep. She got her started with getting dressed (verbal cues) and said ok I'll see you down there. I noticed on camera it was taking mom forever to get dressed and ready. The maintenance guy did stop by for a minute (he will be unclogging her kitchen sink and adding the bar to her shower) and left, so that may have distracted her from what she was supposed to be doing. It's not that she's physically being slow, she's moving around like normal, it's mental. At 8:25 I see she plops back down in her recliner. (breakfast starts at 8am). My first instinct is to just call her to remind her to go down, but that doesn't let K know that she is having problems remembering to get down there, so I just texted her about it. A couple minutes later she was there, reminding mom and then she texted me that she had just realized mom wasn't down in the dining room and had been headed back up there. She also realized mom had pulled out a dirty top from the hamper to wear, so she had her change into a clean top. By the time mom got down there it was like 8:45. They apparently must have been finishing up with everyone, as she came back up to her apartment with her breakfast in a "to go box". Well, at least she got her breakfast. I'm really just hoping this is all related to the week of having the cold and being so out of her normal routine. I know it can take a couple of weeks to really get over a cold and feeling run down by it, so I am hoping that is what is causing this increase in memory issues and confusion. (mostly it's just memory, not confusion)

DD is a bit miffed about her boss and company. During the WFH for 2 years, apparently a couple people in her division moved away. Then when they all had to return to the office, 4 days a week minimum, these people ended up getting a special waiver. Now her boss (who she hasn't really had too long and does not like) is taking a leave of absence and they are putting in as temporary manager one of the people that moved out of the area and works from home 100%. DD said she and her coworkers are just flabbergasted - they are expected to be in the office, but the person managing them will never be?! I asked her with no manager physically in your office, how would they even know if you came in or worked from home? She said good question!

We've noticed the neighbors visiting family has been fairly quiet. We figured it was because it's been rainy so they haven't been outside screaming. Then dh said he noticed he has not seen Mrs outside at all since they've been here. Well, turns out she is sick with a bronchial infection. Poor Mrs, I can't imagine feeling sick like that and having 6 guests, 4 which are screaming kids, and 2 extra dogs. Mr. said they don't go home until Thursday.

I see again this morning Mom is not getting ready. K came back about 8:30 and she flipped on mom's bedroom light and cheerily said "what are you doing?" and mom said something like "well, I'm still in bed" and K said "well, it's time for breakfast!" and mom laughed. Apparently K then went downstairs and just told them to deliver the breakfast up to mom's room. She's eating now. It's also "shower day" again, so that is good. I think K is going to have to start helping with the actual getting dressed and directed out the door to the dining room. Before last week mom was often getting up and ready on her own about 50% of the time, the rest of the time she was usually ok with being woke up and told it was time to get ready. She'd get up, get dressed quickly, and go down to eat. 

I had hoped she'd be showing a little improvement each day, but she seems to be going in the opposite direction. I think I might take off Friday afternoon and maybe I can get an appt to tour this care home and get on the list, get the shower head installed and visit with mom.

 

The doctor called

The doctor's office called about the biopsy results. It came back clean - no cancer! She said that can happen sometimes, with a low Gleason score like he had, but I honestly don't think it would have happened it I hadn't started him on that Zyflamend Prostate supplement. Needless to say, I'm going to make sure he keeps taking it! They want to retest his PSA in 6 months.

The biopsy report

I received an email notification that dh's test result was available to view in his MyChart. It didn't read the same as his first biopsy (last December). That first one said this about the biopsy:

FINAL DIAGNOSIS
A. Prostate, left, biopsies:
-Prostatic adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3+3 equal 6 involving 1 of 4 cores (tumor involves approximately 5% of the
involved core, 0.5 mm in linear extent), see comment.
B. Prostate, right, biopsies:
-Mild chronic prostatitis; negative for malignancy

As we were to learn from the doctor, this meant prostate cancer. Albeit, the lowest "score", which was a good thing, but still prostate cancer. Based on this score, the doctor recommended a wait and watch approach and have the biopsy done again in a year.

With his 6 month appt last June and his PSA level going up from 7.3 to 9 something, he wanted to do the next biopsy in October, which dh went and had done last week.  This is the result from this one:

 FINAL DIAGNOSIS
A. Prostate, left, needle core biopsies: Benign prostatic tissue (see comment).
B. Prostate, right, needle core biopsies: Benign prostatic tissue (see comment).

Ok this doesn't look similar to the first biopsy! I know what benign means and I looked up the term "benign prostatic tissue" and that means it's not cancerous. Apparently this biopsy did not show any cancer?? I know they take several "samples" from the prostate when they do this. Is it possible to do a second biopsy and those cancer cells not show up in the second biopsy?

Or did this supplement he's been on for almost 4 months actually reduce his cancer cells, as some (small) studies in the past showed? We know his PSA level decreased a lot since being on the supplement and that in itself is a good thing.

I was expecting at minimum a similar report as the first one, giving him what his Gleason score is and at least hoping it was still at the same low level. Now the report says benign and no Gleason score is listed. It will be interesting to see what the doctor says about it when he gets a hold of dh. I'm hoping it's good news and not just a "oh that is normal, I probably just happened to not get any sample cores that had the cancer in them, but you still have cancer"..........

Squeaky clean

Mom's caregiver had total success with the shower yesterday morning! Woo! It doesn't even sound like mom put up an argument or anything. What a relief. I knew this gal is good at her job. When I knew she was in mom's apartment I watched a quick video clip and mom was walking into her bathroom saying she was going to go use the bathroom and then I heard K say "ok, when you're done there, we'll get your shower going for you". And that was that. 

At first I'm kind of thinking, boy she needs to charge more than $25/hr, but then I realized she is most often probably making more than $25/hr at parts of the day. Like the stop in to wake mom up in the mornings, literally takes like 1 minute and to stop in after dinner and push the medicine dispenser button and hand her her pills is like maybe 3 minutes on average. Then she is off to the next client down the hall to do the same. So in that 15 min she is probably seeing several clients and just made the equivalent of $75/hr. Now of course, while she was at my mom's almost 45 min this morning helping her shower, she was only making the $25/hr because she was with my mom that whole 45 minutes.

K called and updated me around noon. She said mom did great and her cold is over with and she's ok to go back to normal dining room meals and activities. Said she was down for breakfast and one of her tablemates was grumpy and saying "is she supposed to be here? she's sick". K said she had to tell the lady she's fine now, all cleared, haha. She's going to start doing showers with her on Saturdays and Tuesdays (she works Sat-Tues, the other gal is there Wed-Fri). She did request that I buy a new shower head with the handheld hose, which would make it easier on K, helping her shower. I said of course, I will get it installed next weekend, when I am there.

I love K! She is so good. She also said that the original lady and even the other lady told her mom is sometimes grumpy and K said in the 6 weeks she's been on board, she has never seen my mom grumpy. I said I haven't either and I have never seen her grumpy with them on the camera clips when they come. (maybe they were getting her confused with another client?). Another thing she did yesterday that totally impressed me, too, was about 10 or 15 minutes before dinner started in the dining room, she stopped by mom's apartment to remind her to go down for dinner. I'm sure mom is confused what's what right now after having to stay in her apartment all week. She just stopped in and said "hi, are you hungry, want to go down for dinner?" and mom said '"oh sure, that sounds good" and off they went. Of course she was back after dinner to give mom her meds.

Next post: dh's biospy results that showed up in his "MyChart"....what? am I reading it right?!

The birthday fail

I am such a terrible liar, LOL. So it's my boss's birthday and I get a call from one of my co-workers yesterday morning. He wants to do a zoom call/meeting, where he calls my boss and we all are on the zoom call to sing her happy birthday. But, he needs me to schedule a fake meeting with her (to make sure she's free at that time)....oh great, LOL. Ok, I'll try!

So, I send her a chat message saying hey, I need some help with such and such, can we schedule a time to chat later? say 11? (this is like 2 hours out). I know my boss. First off, she and I rarely schedule meetings. She's the one who is usually busy, so I always just say hey call me when you are free, as I am almost always free (other than on payroll days). So, I then figured as soon as I said that I wanted to do a meeting, she's say "I'm free now", so I'd have to make up some excuse why I'm not free for 2 hours....so I make up something about my mom and I'm waiting for a call back from her caregiver, etc. 

Ok, so far so good. She agrees to the 11am meeting. Then 2 minutes later messages me, "send me some example of the issue you are having". OMG...so I tell her I'll work on that,haha. Then a half hour before the call, she messaged me that something has come up and she'll have to reschedule me to the afternoon or Monday. OMG! Ok, no problem! I message co-worker back and he cancels the zoom invite and we are on hold with it now. I said I'm sure this afternoon she will suddenly message me and say hey, I'm free now. I told co-worker I'd try to hold her off 10 to 15 minutes and he said he'll then try to get whoever is available on the call quickly and we'll try again. She got back in the afternoon and sent me a couple emails and then a message she was back, but didn't say anything about rescheduling. I messaged the co-worker she is back. He was trying to get whoever he could together, but then boss's status went red again. About 10 min later he messages me, "you're off the hook on this....but boss will probably never trust you again! haha".  I asked so, does she know I lied? LOL. Yep, he told her everything. 

Right then boss messages me "YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!!" and then a funny gif of someone inside a "box of shame". I messaged back a "who me?" funny gif. We had a good laugh because she knows me. She said she told co-worker he probably has no idea how much he stressed me out! haha. I'm like I know! First I have to lie, then lie about why it's 2 hours later to meet, and then you want freakin examples of my issue! and then you canceled! 

Hopefully I'll have more of an update of how mom is doing later today. The main caregiver is back on duty and I see she just grabbed mom's laundry and was taking it out, but I didn't see mom in the video clip. She's probably flown the coop and out in the halls or trying to get breakfast, LOL. Keeping fingers crossed she is successful with the showering. Lord know mom needs one now. I'm sure she will be pretty persistent/insistent to get her to take one.

Money this and that

I have enough in my HSA account now to start investing it, long term, until retirement, and my contributions going forward will keep adding to it. It's also nice that the account has a feature that will just "sweep" my (and employers) future contributions over to the investment account, so it's all automated now. Of course day 3 and it's already taken a loss. I don't even want to look at my 401k. It's bad enough that I have to look at mom's investment account and see how poorly it's all doing. I'm just going to tell myself that that HSA money is investing in the stocks at probably rock bottom prices and when they go back up, it will be nice gains, then. Right?...LOL. 

My mom's medicare advantage plan has a $200 a year OTC benefit to order through this little catalog they have. It's a use it or lose it each year thing (that I only discovered last year). There was still $111 left to use up by the end of this year, so I ordered some things. Acetaminophen, neosporin, hydrocortisone cream, etc. The stuff is a little overpriced, so it's easy to use up the allocation pretty easily. But, at least it's some needed/used supplies for no out of pocket. I'm glad I remembered to log in and use the up the rest of this years account balance. She might as well take advantage of the benefit offered, since she has to pay $131 a month for the plan.

Yesterday morning the new caregiver forwarded me the text that the other lady had sent out to most clients about her retirement and K taking over. She said there are a few who said they didn't receive it either. At least now I feel all up to speed what is going on. She was also kind enough to let me know that the other lady that works for her is on duty the next few days and she let her know that mom still sounded congested. I said she did when I talked to her, but that from the camera watching I see she seems to have her normal energy and strength back, as she got dressed and is getting around her apartment well again. Also during our phone conversation the previous day she recommended getting mom on a waiting list for an assisted living/memory care place she knows of. Again, she seems of the same opinion as the first caregiver, try to avoid the 2 large assisted living and memory care places in town. She said she worked at the memory care place awhile. Not so much due to the care itself, but because the cost is so expensive and these smaller places offer more care/attention. She texted me the email contact at this care home and I emailed yesterday to inquire about getting on their waiting list for mom.

Then just before lunch I got K's first billing for mom! Woo! LOL. And a quick and easy link to pay online via bank or credit card. I just chose bank account, because I use this same exact system for invoicing where I work, and I know if the customers pay via credit card we get charged an extra 3.5%. I paid her immediately.  Plus, I figure the less she has to do with tracking down getting paid, the more time she has towards caregiving.

And continuing on the money topic, for the life of me cannot understand why my dh can't even pay for an order online without it not going through. I got him another one of those visa gift cards so he can buy me Christmas presents without me seeing the charges on our card. Only he can never get it to work. Same problem last year. He tried ordering something a week or two ago, tried like 3 times, and it wouldn't go through. Then he just tried buying something different from a different online store and nope. I took the card info and just bought a $5 Amazon e-gift card with it. Worked fine, no problems. Took the card info back downstairs to his den and said it worked just fine for me. I started to go back up the stairs and he starts slooowwwly typing the card info in again and what do you know - the purchase went though! 

I'm keeping busy in the evenings with new shows back on tv. I like to watch The Voice and Young Sheldon. In between, I'm watching a tv series on Netflix.

The new caregiver

Mom's new caregiver called me yesterday afternoon and we had a great chat. I am going to really like her, I think. She is so on the ball. She has a masters degree in healthcare and very easy to communicate with. Apparently the other lady retired (health reasons, it sounds like) so this new gal (K) purchased the business/clients from her. She said that the original lady sent out a text to all her client's family members telling about the change, but I never got it, so that is why I've been in the dark as to what has been going on. She also said the original lady had her computer crash awhile back and lost all her documents used to do her billing, so that is what is going on, as original lady is supposedly trying to get her computer files recovered. K is starting billing as of Sept and has also been working on trying to get all the clients family members contact info, as that was lost by the other lady, too. 

Anyway, she said she'd let the other lady know that I'm still looking for billing from June 20th to her last day in business and I'd love to pay her. I told her to tell her even if she just wants to do a close estimate so I can send her a check, I'm ok with that, too. 

K really seems to pay attention and I'm very impressed with her so far. I said that one of the things I really need mom to start having assistance with is showering and she agreed. I said I had asked the original lady to help with this and apparently after mom denied her offers to help shower a few times, she didn't keep trying, but never told me this and didn't pass on to K that showering was one of the things to help with. So, she is going to give it a try with mom this weekend and see if she can get her to start doing it twice a week, or at least once. I said I got her to shower 2 weeks ago, but it was a struggle and she finally agreed when I told her her hair really needed washing. I said another tactic that might work on mom, is for K to tell her that her daughter asked her to help her with this. She said she also has noticed at times mom will hang up dirty clothes back in the closet and I said she's also put just clean clothes back in the hamper. She said she's been trying to watch what she is wearing and if she finds it back in her closet the next day, she puts it in the hamper, but also said maybe she'll need to start adding in helping her to get dressed in the mornings, so she's getting clean clothes on, and I said that would be great and I'm ok with her adding in anything she sees mom might need help with. I also told her mom's pills she takes once a day, can be changed to a different time, if there is another time of day that works better in K's daily schedule. She said that time after dinner is fine. They have several to help with that and works good to do right after dinner.

She also said she is doing learning and classes, etc specifically for trying to help dementia patients, as that is her main passion. She is getting trained on ways to help outside of big pharma. Things like music, scents/oils, and cbd gummies (to help with things like agitation and calming them). One of her long term goals is to start her own assisted living care place for those dementia, as we don't have much memory care places in our area. She said that is something that is probably at least 5 years out for achieving.

I again made sure she knew I had the 2 cameras in mom's living room/kitchen area. She thinks they are a good thing and says several family members of other clients do the same. She said one of her clients fell in his bathroom last week, but no one knew for a bit because of course, no camera in there, but she thought maybe putting one in mom's bedroom, too, might be a good idea.

A full day

What a morning it was yesterday. I noticed Monday from checking on mom with the camera that she was blowing her nose quite a bit and coughing some. (She was fine Sunday afternoon) Then yesterday morning the camera notification showed the caregiver (the newer lady) stop in and remind mom about breakfast. Mom's bedroom door was mostly shut, so after that, other than I could tell her bedroom light was on, I couldn't see and I was getting up and ready for my day. Well, about 8:10 another notification popped up on my phone and it was the caregiver coming back to check on my mom again (because she didn't show up in the dining room). Well....mom was sitting on the floor in her bedroom! It appears she just slid down along the wall right inside her door, next to her nightstand. K (the caregiver) talked to her and she was fine, not hurt, but she couldn't get her up (mom weighs about 180). I then called mom's landline and K answered and said she's ok, just can't get back up, so she's going to call 911 for "lift service" for her, which she did after we got off the phone. They got there really quick and got her back up sitting on the edge of her bed and left. K then helped her get dressed and she was able to walk out to her recliner to sit. K then arranged for the kitchen to deliver mom's meals the next couple of days. She did eat breakfast (at her table) and then went back to her recliner and slept some. Mom was not having any confusion, nor was she upset or agitated by any of it.

Before I hung up with K, I said I know this isn't the time, but when you have time please call me back about billing for my mom. She's been having care for 4 months now and no billing! I guess she is taking over for the other lady I originally hired. Said something about the original caregiver's computer crashed and she's hearing from some others they haven't been billed either. She said she is working on this. But, how strange that the original caregiver would not at least notify her clients that she was having someone else take over her caregiving business?! But, I REALLY like this new gal. I was watching/listening on the camera feed when she called to get lift service and she had to give her name and ph#. I looked her up to see if she is on Facebook and found her and also she has as a separate Facebook page for her new caregiving business (and she's advertising to hire help). She does vlogs about caring for elderly and specifically a lot to do with dementia. I think she is going to be so good. I'm looking forward to talking with her more and I have a feeling I'll probably be adding on some extra help with her.

So then mom went down for lunch (of course forgot she wasn't supposed to go down) and when it was over one of the staff had walked her back to her apartment. Mom said she was fine. The lady told her, no you are sick. Then mom promptly fell asleep in her recliner and stayed that way until I got there at 3:45, after dh's appointment. I woke her up and took her temperature, which was normal, thankfully. She seemed fine, other than a bit stuffy in the nose and a bit weak, still. I refilled her water glass and set it next to her. I didn't want to stay too long (dh was pretty uncomfortable after having the biopsy) and I didn't want to catch a cold. I reminded her she needs to stay in her apartment for a couple days and they will bring meals. She tried to say "it's just a cold, I feel ok" but I said they don't want you spreading it to the other people, so then she seemed to understand. Thankfully from her having the cold and the mornings ordeal (which she had no memory of) she was having no confusion. She fell right back asleep in her recliner after I left and slept again until the caregiver stopped in at 5 to check on her and told her she'd be back after 6 for her meds. Mom went right back to sleep until she came back. Her dinner didn't get brought up until about 6:15. I heard the caregiver call down to check on the meal for her and another apartment and they were running late. She did eat some at her table and then went back to her recliner and there she slept......all evening....all night....until 6:10 this morning when she got up and went to her bed. She's up and about now and her breakfast just got delivered. She seems to be walking much more her normal speed.

DH's doctor hadn't even looked at his PSA result, so dh asked about it. He said it's normal to fluctuate some, but that is a pretty significant decrease, so keep taking the supplement. But on the flip side, he said his prostate has enlarged more since last visit. It will be interesting to see the biopsy results compared to last time. Hopefully nothing has changed. DH said this time it was much more uncomfortable that the first time, not sure why. The results usually take 5-7 days to get back.

Before we left I had reminded dh that he still had 2 parts ordered from the place we got the plow attachment from and the guy had said they should be in mid October. One part we already paid for, the other still needed to be paid. So, dh called them after we left the dr office and after being put on hold a couple of times they finally determined that yes, they do have them in, so we stopped in there to pick those up. Dh needed to use a bathroom by then anyway. 

The caregiver had left her ph# on a sticky note for me, so when we got home I texted her that I got the note w/her # and that I checked in on my mom and no fever. I asked her to call me whenever is most convenient for her schedule, no rush, and I know she rec'd the text because she tagged it with a pink heart :). I just want to make sure we are on the same page with mom's care, since she's taking over, clarify the cost, see if we can figure out what we owe them since June 20th. If nothing else, at least just take what she knows to bill for a current month and use that amount for the unpaid months. According to her Facebook page she bought out the caregiving company from the other lady, so I'm guessing she also bought any receivables the company is owed. Obviously the original lady isn't concerned with getting paid for it, so I guess it will go to this new owner. I also want to make sure showering is getting done now, whether mom wants the help or not.

In other news the "family from hell" is back visiting next door. I swear they seem to come every time dh needs a day of peace and quiet and rest, they are here, and they are loud and they are outside in front of our property/house. I told dh they must not have gotten the hint from their new neighbors at their vacation cabin, that they are loud, obnoxious and intrusive, LOL.

A hopeful sign

Dh had to get his PSA blood test done again last week for his upcoming biopsy check tomorrow. The hospital has this new online portal to see test results, etc so I signed him up for it. The PSA test result is back......

So, you may recall that after his last checkup with the urologist in June, his PSA had gone up even more. I can't remember now exactly what he said it was but 9. something sticks in my mind. I know it was an increase. I did find a note I made from a year ago, when he first went into see him that it was 7.3. I did some online research and came across a couple of articles about this supplement "Zyflamend" that were written up by Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center and I think the other was Columbia University. So, he's been taking it daily almost 4 months now.

I just logged into the hospital portal to see if his PSA results were showing and it's saying his PSA is 5.19!!! I hope I am reading it right. That's actually all it says, just "5.19". I haven't said anything to dh yet. I don't want to get his hopes up and me be wrong, so I'm just going to wait until we hear what the doctor says tomorrow. But, I think I'm excited! It will be interesting to see if his biopsy changes any. Praying and fingers crossed.

I got to mom's place about 12:40, while everyone was still in the dining room. I checked with the gal at the desk, to have her look up what they have my phone number as, and sure enough, it was STILL in as my mom's old cell #. She updated it right then, so I hope it is finally fixed. I don't know why the lady I talked to on Saturday didn't fix it then. I also asked her about the caregiver that helps mom (and works for many residents) - that she has worked for mom 4 months now and no billing! and she won't reply to my asking for it. I also said I know there is a new lady, what is her name? She said that she thinks the caregiver is transitioning her business over to these 2 other ladies. I told her to pass the word that I would love to pay them! Geez! Why wouldn't that main caregiver (it was her business) tell her clients what is going on? But I really like what I've seen of this new lady. She's super sweet and caring.

On Saturday evening, when the caregiver came to do her meds, I heard her also say she was going to get mom's laundry from the dryer and would be right back. She came back with the basket of clean laundry but then set it on mom's bed and asked her if she wanted her to put it away and mom said no, she's do it. Well, I had already had this conversation with the main lady a couple months ago because I had gotten there and we realized mom had just dumped it all back into her hamper, so I said you'd better be the one to put it away for her. But, I'm sure this probably is something that got missed passing on to the new gal. Anyway, when I got there yesterday the full basket of clean laundry was sitting on the floor next to her dresser, of course she never put away and wouldn't have. I thought about leaving it until maybe the lady would then see it last night and realize mom didn't put away, but I was also afraid between now and then mom would put in hamper again, so I put it all away. But last night when she came to do meds, I heard her say to mom "oh, I see you got your clean clothes put away, that's good". Mom say oh yes I did. LOL

I did get her tv working again. She had it an unplugged mess. The new remote control I ordered hasn't come yet, so I tried a temp fix. I put some black tape over the 2 buttons next to the on/off button that she keeps pushing (the input button and the button that turns the cable box on/off) and messing up the tv (which I think she then tries to unplug to "fix"). After dinner last night she was able to turn the tv on and I see she watched tv all evening! I have not seen her do that in a long time. 

I just sadly see her world getting smaller and smaller. It was an hour of the same questions over and over...and constantly about eating. Going in the afternoon, right after lunch did no good either. Every few minutes she would say "so, what should be do to go eat?" or "what should I do so we can have dinner (or lunch)" Each time I would say you just got done with lunch about 15, 20, 30 minutes ago and dinner isn't until 5pm. Yes, I already had lunch. No, it's not time for dinner yet. I had stopped at the store and got her some vitamins, tissues and cookies. Over and over "make sure you pay yourself back for those" Then she kept wanting to send some of the cookies home with me. I said no, those are for you to have so you have treats in your apartment. I have treats at home. But the constant on and on about eating just wears me down. She called me 3 times in 30 minutes yesterday morning after I told her I was coming. Then when she walks into the apartment and sees me there she says "oh, I guess I thought you were coming tomorrow". I'm just not even going to call and tell her anymore, I'm just going to show up. She had me worn out before I even got there.

Aching body

Yesterday was a sore aching muscles day by the time we were done. Needed to get all the iris plants cut down and decide where to plant the 2 buckets of iris bulbs gifted by Mrs Neighbor. First it was too cold and I had to cool dh's jets to get out there when it wasn't even 40 degrees yet! After a bit he says "about how long do you think it will be before you are ready to go out?" I walked over to the thermometer and saw it said 43 degrees and I said "in about 7 more degrees".

When I get out there I see this iris. What the heck did you do to it??! "Um...I used the weed whacker". Well don't! Geez! They have to be cut down and at an angle. Just leave the job to me. 

DH's method

My method

We decided to plant a row of iris bulbs out along the other side of our street, hoping they will grow and form a buffer a couple feet tall and deter anyone from trying to drive off the road to turn around. I think we planted like 45 of them. Oh my aching back and legs by the time we were done planting and me cutting down all the existing ones.

When we got to the back yard (just a few there) and just got finished Mr Neighbor had come down to his backyard so we walked over to the fence and ended up chatting with him a good long while. 

Right after I made my post yesterday morning I get a call from my mom, but it was one of the office lady's that works at her place. I thought oh dear...this can't be good. Well, it was just about the flu and covid booster. Apparently they have tried to call me but the number wasn't going through. I'm pretty sure they were trying my mom's old cell#. My mom had locked her keys in her apartment and this lady was letting her in, so decided that was a good time to find my ph# and call me. A year or so ago I realized they had her # as mine and I thought they fixed it, but apparently not. That is scary! What if there had been an emergency with my mom and they couldn't get a hold of me?! When I go in today to see her I am checking with the office again to make sure they have my ph#! Geez.

My plan today is to stop at Walgreens near mom's place and pick her up some tissues and snacks and get there before she's back from lunch and then do a quick run through to find more stuff to get out of her apartment. I know I need to take out the old bills and stuff in her file cabinet. I saw her going through it again the other day and she's not realizing these are old bills from years ago. They need to go. Then once she's back I'll visit with her an hour or so before I go pick up groceries and head home.

Update: well it doesn't seem to matter what time I'm going to mom's LOL. I called her a little while ago to let her know I'm coming. I just told her I'd be there around 1:15....after you get back from lunch. "well what time is your lunch?" Umm...I'll be done with lunch, I'll be there at 1:15. Twenty minutes later she calls me "what time did you say you are coming?"....again I tell her and she says, so do you want lunch? No, I'll be there after you go down to eat your lunch at noon. Then I'm sure when I get there it will be 20 questions of "did you have lunch?" Oh well.

Update #2 - mom is going to wear me out today before I even get there. She has called me 3 times now in the last half hour asking what time and trying to figure out lunch. So much for my idea of trying to go after lunch to avoid the lunch conversation over and over. I'm to the point I don't even think I'm going ot call anymore and let her know I'm coming. Just show up from now on.

Cold Saturday morning

Another work week in the books. I learned something new yesterday. I can put my phone on Do Not Disturb when I go to bed at night, but set it so that it will allow certain people to ring through. I hate leaving my phone's volume/ringer on after I go to bed. There is inevitably some random text that dings and wakes me up. But, as mom ages, I worry what if she tries to call me during the night with an emergency? So, this should be a good way to ease my mind and still have my phone "off" when I go to bed. I also let dd's # call through, of course.

I'm going to cut down all the iris plants today, but I'm going to wait until the chill gets out of the air at like 40 degrees outside right now. It's supposed to warm up to 68. I have no idea where dh plans to plant all the bulbs Mrs gave him, but I'm going to suggest a long row out on the other side of the road, where he had those wood beams to keep the boat launch users out of. Two foot tall blades of leaves all bunched together should also do the trick and look nice. We'll see if he agrees. He a guy...if it's my idea...you know the story.

Last evening the cat was meowing like crazy and all over the place. He wouldn't settle down. A bit later we heard there was a small earthquake near by. That's probably what he was freaking out about. DH said the neighbors dogs were barking, too.

We used to often drive to this little mom and pop drive thru burger joint in the next town. Really good burgers. Then they sold it. The first visit with new owners and it was really bad burgers. We gave them another try months later and it was at least better, but not really good. We haven't been there in months, but decided to try again last night and it was really good again. Thank goodness, LOL. Still stupid expensive, but they are right off the freeway and it's a tourist trap, so they have stupid prices. We usually only go every 2 months or so, if we are really craving a burger.

My fall pillow cases and pumpkin and leaves decor also came yesterday. I need to get the pillow cases ironed out and then I'm going to put them over the throw pillows on the church pew. I'm not exactly sure where I'm putting the pumpkins and fake leaves. They are a little small to put on the seat of the church pew or the floor around it, but we'll see. I knew they would be on the smaller side and figured I'll probably end up using them on the dining table or on the hutch.

I still haven't decided what time I'm going to visit mom tomorrow but that's ok, haha. I can pick up my groceries anytime and I'll decide when I get up tomorrow. And now that mom doesn't remember I don't need to even tell her today I'm coming tomorrow, she wouldn't remember tomorrow anyway. I'll just call her in the morning sometime....or just show up. Either works nowadays with her.

Late delivery

At 3:15 yesterday afternoon the delivery driver for the desk called to update me. Said they were delivering at a town (about 2 1/2 hours away) and assembling some furniture and then headed to our stop, so it will be in the evening. So, I figured, ok, an hour or so at their current stop and 3 hours (being generous) to drive here, they should be here around 7:30 or so. 8pm rolls around, then 9pm. Good grief. Finally at 9:15 dh calls the delivery driver's phone # from my cell phone. Like are you guys almost here? He says they are still like 90 minutes away. Dh was like geez....you guys think it's ok to deliver to someone's home at 11pm? Anyway, they finally showed up at 11pm with the desk.

Finally, after 7 months since I ordered it (ordered on March 11) and 2 tries to get it, the desk is complete and set up. Dh says he really likes it and it's a nice solid wood desk. I'm not sure I'd ever order furniture from Pottery Barn again, though. What a hassle this has been.

Mrs Neighbor gave dh a whole bunch more Iris bulbs (his favorite), like 2 buckets full! My plan tomorrow is to cut all our iris's down for the fall/winter and I guess dh will be planting more, haha. Most of the ones she gave us 2 years ago to plant grew like crazy huge this year and also are spreading. 

My weekend plans are to do some yard maintenance (iris's), housecleaning, and go see my mom on Sunday and pick up a grocery order. I'm still trying to decide what to time to go on Sunday. I like to go in the mornings, between breakfast and lunch, but she drives me nuts with the constant asking me about eating. I think I may just tell her I'll be there at 1pm, but get there a little early so I can go through her apt and fill up another bag of stuff to get out of there before she comes back to her apartment for lunch. But most likely she'll still spend the whole time asking me "did you eat? did you get lunch?" At least with ordering from Albertson's, I can go pick up my order anytime that day, as long as I'm there by 7pm, so if I wake up Sunday and decide to go see her after lunch, I can change my mind and not be tied into the set hour of pickup, as with Walmart. I've always tried to imagine what it must be like for "time" in her brain now. My guess is that basically she's pretty much always in the present few minutes, so if I've been there an hour and a half and it's time to leave, she doesn't think I've been there that long, at all. On the flip side, I guess, is that if she hasn't seen me for a week or more, it doesn't seem like that long to her either.

With dh setting up his new desk he had to turn off his computer and unplug, so at least this morning I didn't have to try to remember to do his weekly restart that I'm trying to remember to do on his computer now. 

dogs and desks

Nothing much new going on. Mr Neighbor told dh that their son & family are coming for a few days of hunting next week and guess what....leaving their 2 dogs again, until they come back Thanksgiving. I can't imagine doing that to family pets, how confusing it must be for the dogs to have to do this all the time.

I think DD and her dh are coming for Christmas. She keeps telling me she thinks that's the plan, but then says she needs to confirm it with her dh. 

Still keeping fingers crossed that dh's desk actually gets delivered today. I have my phone ringer turned on and up, haha, so I don't miss the call that they are getting close. Usually when I have my phone sitting on my desk I just have it on vibrate. But, from what the guy said they won't be here until the end of the day.

For some reason I've been having trouble waking up at my normal time the past week. No clue what's changed. I've been going to bed at the same time as always, but now waking up like 15 to 20 minutes later. But watch, when the weekend comes I'll wake up at my normal time, LOL. 

Dh has been wanting to change his cell ph# that he's had FOREVER (I'm not joking...think back to the old original "brick" cell phones! LOL) to a local area code number, for a while now. But, then every time I say, ok you want me to change it? He changes his mind. Finally, this morning he said he wants to change it. It was really easy to do online and took effect in about 5 minutes. I'm leaving my number alone. I could care less that it isn't "local" and since I also use it for work, I don't want to have to change the #. 

That's all that's going on today. Not much at all.

No title day

Sometimes I think of a blog post title even before I start typing. Most times it's after, after I see where my ramblings ended up. Sometimes I just can't think of a title and the post sits here on my computer, unposted for hours, because I'm trying to think of something! So, here ya go. No title. LOL.

I start do do payroll yesterday and the payroll company completely changed their program. OMG! I knew from some emails they were "updating" their system, but just thought it was some minor cosmetic type changes. Oh no, it was now all layed out in a completely different format and they even changed the names of things. I used to go to the tab "create paydata batch". Now it's called "worksheet". I had to watch a couple of videos they had to figure out what is what now. My boss asked - well did they at least make it easier with the changes? Nope! LOL.

I pinned my mom down for a call after she got back from lunch. She seemed ok, not confused like the prior day. I say I'm just calling to see how you are doing today? She says I was going to call you this past weekend, but I guess I got busy or forgot. I said we did talk last weekend, we talk just about every day :)  She says "oh we do?". I had hoped the new "Flipper" tv remote I ordered yesterday would be here by Friday, but it's showing next week sometime, so I guess getting that to her and seeing if it will help, will have to wait until the following visit.

My Christmas trees decor arrived, to go with the reindeer. 

And guess what?! The desk ordered from Pottery Barn last March is finally supposed to be here Thursday! The delivery company called to schedule it. I'll believe it when I see it, as we are scheduled for their last delivery of the day and if this is the same company that has delivered big stuff to us before, they have canceled on us because they ran out of time and then we had to wait another week until they were out in our area. They start out leaving the city, drive right past our house, then he said their first stop is waayyyy up north end of the state, then a couple stops at towns on the way back down and then we're the last stop they will have. He said it might be like 6pm when they get to our house, is that ok? I said yes, it is totally ok. Just deliver it, LOL.

Today we have to run into the hospital lab in town for dh to get his PSA blood test done and stop at the pharmacy for some antibiotic he needs to take the day of his prostate biopsy next week. This will be the test to see if that supplement I've been having him try has helped any. My guess is the results will be inconclusive, like his biopsy and PSA levels will be the same, so we won't really know if that's because it's just not getting worse yet, or if the supplement is what was helping it not get worse. Though...from those articles I initially read about the studies done on this supplement, some showed a reduction in their PSA levels and even a reduction in their cancer cells. Maybe he'll be one of the lucky ones and get a benefit from it.

Forgetting vs confusion

My mom had a pretty rough day yesterday with confusion. It's one thing to just not remember and have almost no short term memory. It's a different animal to deal with when it's confusion. She called me around 4pm. I think someone from the staff might have suggested she call me to get her bearings, but she kind of seemed to think they were going to call me. She was also realizing she was very confused. She didn't really seem to know where she was. She asked if this was her place she's always lived or is she just here for awhile? I told her she in her own apartment and has lived there over 2 years. I told her she was in her apartment and that was her furniture and clothes. She said she had talked to some "ladies" downstairs and they were so nice to her and trying to help her understand where she was. Again, it's hard to decipher a lot of what she's talking about because it's just disjointed and incomplete sentences because she can't think of the words she wants to use. One part was she didn't know if she was staying here (at the apartment) or if she was going to have to come live with me because her brain isn't working. After we hung up, a few minutes later she left her apartment, I assume because dinner was on her mind (we talked about dinner being in an hour) and she didn't come back until 6pm, as usual. Not sure what she did for the hour until dinner started.

The caregiver came about 6:15pm to get her meds and mom was in her bedroom, as she walked in and was dispensing the meds. Mom told her someone had been in her apartment and took stuff. The caregiver (this is the newer gal) was so good with her in trying to assure her everything was ok. After she left mom called me again and was saying the same to me, that someone had been in her apartment. I asked her same as the caregiver did "what makes you think someone was in your apartment?" Mom told me "well, the door was unlocked when I came back". I said well, you've been forgetting your key sometimes and leaving the door unlocked, but no one was in there. Then she mentioned about them taking stuff, so I then asked if there was anything missing? She said "well, no....but I'm still looking". I again assured her all was ok. She then said she didn't know where her purse was and I told her she's hidden it so well that I haven't even found it lately! I told her don't worry about your purse, you don't need it for anything. Then she said she thought maybe she took it with her to dinner and left it. I reminded her she doesn't need her purse to go eat the meals and again, like last week, she thought she had to pay for the meals.

I haven't been able to pin her down this morning for a call to see how she's doing. She comes into her apartment to use the bathroom and leaves again. I have the motion set so I know when she's back and then I see her go back to her bathroom and then as soon as she's done she's headed back out the door before I get a chance to call. She's apparently not doing exercise class...as it starts at 11am and is in the area right outside her apartment door. She just came into her apt at 11:13, just long enough to use the bathroom and back out, so not sure why she's not joined in on exercise. I could hear it going on when she opened her door and it's on the activity schedule. And 15 minutes later she's back, to her bathroom, and then out the door again. Who knows what she's doing out in the common areas...my guess is she wanders, then back to her apt for a few minutes, then wanders the halls some more, repeat. At least she knows how to get to her apartment.

The forgetting part of her life isn't as bad as the confused part. When she's confused it's super hard to deal with and hard to know what to say to her. I just kind of went with how the caregiver was talking to her. That seemed good to just keep reassuring her. 

Dh decided to order snow tires and wheels for the new car. Not studded tires, but just snow rated tires to use during the winter months. And wheels he doesn't care of they get all the sand and de-icer chemicals all over them all winter. He's just ordering them and they come all mounted and balanced and he'll just have to put them on himself, which will be no problem for him to do. He has the air compressor and tools to do it.

The cat just came up from outside and jumped up on my desk to sit in front of me. OMG, he totally smells like stinkbugs! What the heck did he do, roll in them? 

So, speaking of caregivers...so there is the main lady (who then hires these extra ladies to help work there) and the 2 other caregivers. I want to do something for them as a little Christmas gift....but not sure what to do..some kind of giftcard? What do you think I should give each of them? How much? I'm terrible at this kind of stuff. Or just give them cash/check type bonus?

Saved money Monday

I can't reply to comments signed in as me, for some reason, so that's why no replies the past 2 days. I'm signed in but when I try to reply it shows me as not signed in.

I did find the hair clippers charger. Right where I thought it was...after looking in my office drawers and cabinets first, of course. In one of the storage bins we had moved to the next bedroom's closet I had put all those mystery cords I took from my mom's place and started looking through those and found the one for the hair clippers. It even says Wahl on the plug in part. I charged the clippers awhile and then put all of it in the bag for the clippers, that I keep in our bathroom. In my searching around, I also found 2 sets of ear buds and one is the type that will work with my new(ish) cell phone. The iphone 11 I got awhile back doesn't have an earbud jack plugin, like the older phones do. I don't know what this set came with (it's definitely Apple) but it plugs into the charging part of the phone. It didn't come with our new phones, they didn't come with earbuds. I have missed being able to have earbuds to use with my phone, sometimes. This set also comes with a little adapter that I can plug my other "jack" type earbuds into and then plug into my phone. Cool. I had been thinking of buying some new earbuds that would work in my phone, so now I don't have to spend the $. DH also said he wanted a phone charger (why I don't know, he can charge it easily in the house) that plugs into the lighter of his side by side, in case he ever needs to charge his phone while using it. I also found one of those we had for our old car when I was looking for the hair clippers charger. Saved money again.

Since last Christmas I have been wanting a set of reindeer to display indoors. Preferably one sitting and one standing. The few I found I liked were too expensive. A couple weeks ago dd saw these while at Costco and sent me a pic to see if I liked them. They were $60 for the set, so that wasn't bad. I decided to get them and had her order them for me and ship here and they came on Friday. I like them and they are good sized. I also ordered a set of 3 similar designed Christmas trees that are supposed to arrive today. My plan is to put them all on the fireplace hearth when I decorate for Christmas.

Other than Christmas, I'm not a "seasonal" decorator. Just too much work. I follow a few decor pages on Facebook and of course now it's all filled with people's fall decor. But, I did come across a couple of cute ideas for fall decorating on/around a church pew and I think I might do that next year with my church pew. Get a couple of fall pillow case covers and a few fake pumpkins/gourds.

For dinner last night I made a new recipe - chicken fried rice. I saw the recipe on the box of pre-diced frozen chicken breast I had bought awhile back and it looked good. And it was! It was a lot of ingredients and steps (not usually my style at all, LOL) but fairly easy. I halved the recipe as that seemed like it would be enough and if it wasn't good I didn't waste a bunch. But it was just the right amount...for dh to have 3rds LOL. I will definitely make again sometime soon and just make the full amount. It was enough as a meal in itself for us. We had rice, veggies and meat all in one. I did "cheat" on prep where I could. I bought a jar of diced garlic and for the carrots (and peas) I just bought a bag of frozen diced peas and carrots. I had ordered the ginger root with my Walmart order and ordered what I thought was a very small amount and it was this bag of several roots, way too much. I'm wondering if I can grate it up and put in a container and keep in the fridge awhile, to use later. I'll have to check on that.

The grass growing has slowed down. It's hardly grown any since dh mowed it last Wednesday. He said he'll probably have one more mow this week sometime and that will be the last. 

I just had a check to print out and mail for my side job. Thought I was being all on the ball getting done and walking down to the mailbox before the carrier comes this morning...only to be reminded by Mr. Neighbor, who was outside spraying for weeds, that there is no mail today, LOL.

Lazy weekend

Awhile back I bought a new set of hair cutting clippers to use for dh, to replace the one we had for many years. This new one is cordless and charges with a plug in. I did the initial charge and now I can't remember where I put the charging cable! You'd THINK I would have put it in the case the clippers came in.....sigh...

I remember opening it up and charging it in my office. Then I kind of remember dh suddenly saying one day shortly after "can you cut my hair?" and I went upstairs and unplugged it from the charger. After that I don't remember now. I think it was about the same time I brought home a whole BUNCH of misc chargers I took from my mom's apartment. I remember dumping those out on my desk to sort through and see if I could figure out what any were. I have a feeling I forgot about the hair clippers charger and mixed it in with those. I think I stuffed them all back in a sack and put them in a bin that is now in the next bedrooms closet. Ugh. I need to find it! I cut dh's hair yesterday and it's still charged, but one of these days that charge is going to run out. So, that's my task for today. Find what the heck I did with that charger.

I did make a cake yesterday - a funfetti type. Dh's favorite. We had it for dessert while watching a movie last night. An awful movie, I might add, LOL. It was Tom Cruise's "American Made". While I usually like "based on true story" type of movies and usually like Tom Cruise movies, this one was just plain awful. I didn't even finish watching it. 

What else did I do yesterday....I washed our sheets and remade the bed. Emptied the dishwasher and cleaned up the kitchen. Watched some of the show I have been working my way through the seasons. Got caught up on The Voice. I didn't realize it had started a new season, so I'm caught up on that now (over several days). And I took a nap for about an hour. Dinner was "chicken sandwich ring". We haven't had that in awhile and I had a tube of crescent rolls that needed to get used up. Except I forgot to add the green onions to the mixture. Oh well.

Even though my doctor's office couldn't schedule me for my annual exam for 6 more months, they did have the colon home FIT test sent out to me to do and mail in to the lab, so I got that done and the results just came back negative. I still need to go in (different office) for my mammogram, too. 

Well, off to look for that hair clippers charger.......

Worried kitty mom

I'm sitting here this morning with my cup of coffee and the cat in my lap. He apparently had some (mis)adventures all day yesterday and is now content to just sit here. I let him outside around 8am yesterday morning, as per usual. Usually he is back sometime in the next 2-4 hours and then is content to stay inside. Just after lunch time I was on a work zoom meeting for like 90 minutes. By the time I was done working at 4:30 and went downstairs I realized I had not seen kitty all day. DH had been in and out to the shop all day. I went out to the back patio and called and called. Then went out to the shop to ask dh and he realized he hadn't seen him all day either. I walked around the property calling/looking for him. We ended up doing this several times until it got dark around 7:30 pm. We were both pretty worried as he has never been gone like this long before. When it got dark I turned all the back patio lights on, as that is the door he comes to come in. DD kept messaging me asking if he'd come back yet. Finally at 8:30pm he showed up! Thank god. I went to bed around 9pm and for the first time ever kitty slept the whole night on the bed. I didn't have to take him upstairs to my office. Whatever happened to him yesterday he just wanted to be with us all night. I haven't let him out this morning.......

I might be picking up a very easy/little time involved side job. I'll get more details probably next week. The company I work for is involved with/helped create a small non-profit organization and they need someone to do their bookkeeping. The guy that runs the non-profit (it's all part time for those involved) used to work for us, so I remember him. I can't imagine it would be more than a few hours a month. My boss asked me about doing it and said don't feel obligated at all, but I said sure, that would be no problem. I don't know if I mentioned this on my blog, but I recently found out that at some point my other good paying side job is most likely going away. I don't know when, but I'm guessing next year. The owners are going to be selling and retiring and the company that would be purchasing it is already completely established, so would just be merging this business into theirs, so already have an accountant/staff. So, having this new little side job would help take the sting out of that lost income, when that happens.

DD and SIL facetimed us yesterday afternoon - they closed on their 5 acres and were there walking around with the dogs and showing us. We're so excited for them. The land looks very quiet and private. Pretty much all trees. The majority of their lot is to the left of the road.

First up is figuring out where the house will be built and then they have to get a permit to cut down trees and I guess that take 60 days to get. At some point they'd also like to pave the driveway they will share with another house and that couple said they are interested in having it paved, too, so they could share in the cost.

Now the cat is curled up on the floor next to my desk. He apparently has grounded himself and no desire to go outside. 

I think I might make a cake today. I have made any cookies or cake in a long time. 

Dh and I have been watching and kind of chuckling a bit about this local jerk who has been trying to sell his crappy place. He's just a community trouble maker and so many will be glad to see him leave. He and his wife moved here at the same time we did and he just started making trouble right off the bat. I remember looking at a local Facebook page for the town and he'd been here like a month and was bashing one of the 2 bars in town. Just strange. He's never let up in 6 years. So last June he put his place up for sale and linked it on the local Facebook page and said "priced for a quick sale". HA! Not even! He was asking almost $800k - for an old run down piece of crap 2 bedroom house (like plywood subfloor and missing drywall, just down to studs in some rooms) with some run down outbuildings. Well, of course no one has been stupid enough to pay that price and the price just keeps getting dropped and dropped. Just in this past week he dropped it $15,000 and then yesterday another $35,000. He should have just added another 0 to that $35,000 drop and then he'll be in the ballpark of what someone would pay for it. But, hopefully he does get it sold at some point because he's just been bad news for this town/county.

Coffee and cookies

DD has given me 2 ideas for birthday gifts. Coffee pods (because they have to bring their own to the office) and she wants me to make her peanut butter cookies, LOL. I'll have to ship them UPS so they get there in a couple days, rather than the 4 or so USPS takes nowadays. So, 2 gift ideas to stick in a box, haha. She tried the cc cream makeup I got and really like and she said she really likes it too. Maybe I'll get her another tube of that, it's pretty expensive. I also found a cute planner type book on Amazon where she can plan the rooms of her house and notes, quotes, etc. She loves that kind of stuff for her organized brain. Plus it's cute and has flowers on the front cover, LOL. She told me this morning she can't think of any other ideas and that she's old and boring now, she just wants coffee and cookies :)

I kept my mom's camera activated most of yesterday. She seemed restless, though not agitated at all. She seems to have lost her big activity calendar for this month, which I think is causing some of it. She's up and down out of her recliner and in and out of her apartment, where typically she might sit and look at that calendar for 30-60 minutes at a time. I was watching around 3pm and she seemed to be looking for something in drawers, so I decided to call and chat with her. She said "oh, I was just looking over a couple of bills I have due..." Oh...whatcha got there? "A power company bill." (from when she had her home over 3 years ago). I said what's the date on it? "October 25th". What's the year? "2019". I said she must have pulled that out of her filing cabinet, as that is a few years old now and I am taking care of her bills now. She was very sweet and told me she sure is lucky she has me to do that for her and thanked me. At least (so far) dementia hasn't made her mean, like it does so many people.

It's been 3 weeks since that neighbor guy was out on his property for that short time with his excavator. Haven't seen him since. Very odd. He was so busy that week before marking the edge of the street with his measurements, having several locators out to mark utilities, etc. Then nothing. I'm probably going to jinx it by even mentioning it, LOL. 

Well, I've been trying to get this post written and posted all morning, so I guess this is what you get.

Breakfast and computers

My phone rang at 7 this morning. It was my mom. Oh oh, that can't be good. She says "well, I didn't go down for meals yesterday because I can't find my purse". I said why do you need your purse? She says "well, to pay for the meals". Oh boy...I said no, your meals in the dining room are free, they are included in your rent, you don't have to pay anything or need your purse. She was like "oh, ok, thank you". Then I told her that she did eat yesterday. I hung up and then got on the camera app on my phone to see how long she's been up, what she was doing. Well, she went right downstairs....at 7am...I should have thought to also say to her that she doesn't have to go down for breakfast until 8am. She didn't come back up, so I'm sure she's just sitting downstairs in the common area waiting. I'm sure others are up early, too. Hopefully the rest of the day goes better for her. I texted her caregiver yesterday afternoon, again, asking about billing for her services, so I can know what to budget monthly for my mom. No reply. I have not seen her as one of the caretakers on the camera for at least a couple weeks. 

I figured out dh's computer is right at 3 years old, purchased in Sept 2019 (thanks to an old blog post search, haha, I found I bought it at the Staples in the city, so that's why Staples was where I was thinking, I just thought I had ordered it online.) Plus it was a very "budget friendly" pc, so 3 years is probably a good life haha. Reader Alice found an old blog post where I bought him a new one Feb 2016, so that one lasted a little over 3.5 years. But, I'm going to try to milk it out a little longer. It is nice that I don't ever have to pay to replace my computers, so we save there. So, I guess when the time comes to replace his again, I need to look for decent sized memory and good processing speed....anything else? I only spent $369 on this computer he has now, so I guess it equates to a little over $100 a year cost prorated out to have a computer. That isn't much really. But, my luck I'll decide to spend more this next time and get him a better one and it will still only last 3 years, haha. In my old post search I see that this computer I have is already 2 1/2 years old now. Boy, time zips by. I seem to typically get about 5 years on my work computers. Maybe I need to get dh this kind..haha. But I know it was about $1000 computer and it is a Dell.

DH uses the media card slot in his computer quite a bit, due to taking video and pics with his drone and the game camera. It is probably one of the reasons I bought him the pc I did at the time. My computer does not have this. I suppose this probably some UBS adapter one can buy to insert these SD cards into for computers that do not have the slot. I'd like to be able to baby his current computer on another 6 months if possible. We'll see how it goes.

Next week dh goes in for another PSA blood test for his prostate and then the week after goes into his urologist for another biopsy. I am anxious to see if this supplement for prostate I put him on has any effect on lowering his PSA level. He'll have been on it almost 4 months by the time he has the test/biopsy. Keeping fingers crossed but in reality it's probably going to do nothing. This was the supplement I read a few articles about from some well known cancer research hospitals and universities. Figured it was worth a try and if nothing else there is a lot of anti inflammatory stuff in this supplement that sure can't hurt him and could maybe also help his overall inflammation going on throughout his body.

I opened the cabinet under the kitchen sink this morning to get out a dishwasher tab and didn't see kitty went under there, too, and shut the door. I was about to walk back upstairs to my office and heard something...goofball just about got stuck under the sink for awhile, haha.

The "side job" I hate

Now dh's computer is acting up again, being super slow. I have no idea. I am not a tech person. My guess is he doesn't have enough memory and ends up with too many programs and browser tabs open all at once. He gets mad, then tries to do a restart and it takes forever for his computer to restart. Then expects me to figure it out. Well, once restarted that typically makes the issue go away, for the most part. He says it's doing "this, this and that". Finally after looking at it and researching stuff online I said to him NEXT time it's doing it, just come and get me to look at it AS it's doing it. Don't restart. Don't close any programs. I need to see what it's actually doing and see how much memory, etc it is using at the time. I need to see all what programs he's trying to use at one time.

His computer just has 8GB of memory. Supposedly enough for what he uses a computer for? It's not like he's trying to do gaming or photoshop intense type programs. I went and checked my computer (supplied by my employer) and it is 16GB memory. Maybe that is why I don't have any issues and dh is. I'm also reading that 8MG probably isn't enough for Windows 10. 

I also went to task manager to try to see what all was running, using memory, etc. The "disk" % kept spiking to 100%, so I googled that. That's not good, but as usual you get a hundred different reasons of what it could be. I found a couple of articles on like "top 10 things to try" type so I did some of those I could. But, of course first I did a restart. While doing all this I left the task manager open and the "disk" % would be very low and then when I'd open something it would spike to 100% and then go back down to almost nothing. Anyway, I did a few of the suggestions. He got back on his computer and it seemed to work fine the rest of the evening. I watched a video on how to add memory to a pc....probably not something I want to try myself. I'd probably just mess it up more haha. I'd probably be better to just buy him a new computer with 16GB memory. While in Task Manager I also looked to see what "start up" programs he had running that maybe was causing it to restart soooo slow. He hardly has any start up programs, in comparison to my computer, so I don't understand why it's so slow to restart.

I might do some more research on his particular computer model (an HP) and see if I can find exactly what extra memory I would need to buy to try increasing his memory.

headaches, hogs, and holidays

I was reading some of the blogs I read, this morning, and trying to comment but google/blogger is not letting me comment as me. Even though I'm signed in it won't recognize me....so...SAM...I was going to comment that reading about your active grandpup reminds me I'm not ready for another dog yet, LOL.

I ended up with a headache around dinner time last night that I just couldn't shake. I ended up even going to bed a little earlier, but at least I quickly fell asleep. Other than to be woken up at the usual 10:30pm by kitty who was done sleeping with me and wanted to go upstairs to his room (ie my office, LOL).

DH just got up (probably because the neighbor dogs were barking up a storm for a few minutes about something) and appears to be now dressed for lawn mowing day, LOL. He last mowed last Wednesday so it's probably time, though it's got to be getting close to being done for the season. We sure are having a horrible "stinkbug" season this fall. Supposedly that means we'll have a very cold snowy winter. Somehow they even find a way to get inside and I am frankly tired of them. 

I need to come up with some idea(s) for dd's upcoming birthday gift, next month.  She will be 27. I also want to do something to congratulate her when she finishes up her master's degree at the end of next month.

Her dh is on a hunting trip with his dad and uncles and wanted to get a wild hog and he got one already yesterday so he is happy. I don't think he's every hunted those before, but he likes to smoke/bbq so I'm sure he'll make some tasty things from it and have meat to put in their new freezer. She is also enjoying the few days of being by herself. Even though they've only been married 3 years they have lived together 6 or 7 years so she appreciates the break, haha. I told her I am jealous ;)

And it's time to start thinking about the holidays and what I am going to do with/for my mom this year. It was obvious last year that 2 nights was too much/too confusing to her. I wouldn't be surprised if now 1 night away is confusing to her, but hopefully not. But that still makes it hard because that means having her stay only one night means having to drive either to pick her up or take her back on the actual holidays. Spending a couple hours driving isn't my idea of a nice holiday, either. Sigh.........

I just took some mail out to the mailbox and now know what the dogs were barking at. Their lawn maintenance guy showed up, haha. Doing fall lawn maintenance. I figured they were barking because someone had pulled in their driveway. When they are all barking and it only lasts a minute or two, that's what it usually is.

Monday this and that

Back to Monday again. It's really foggy out this morning, but supposed to clear off and be sunny and 75 today. It even feels a little chilly upstairs in my office this morning. I decided to turn the heat on a little. Mrs Neighbor brought over a little bouquet of her yard flowers yesterday while I was gone visiting my mom. Probably the last of those for the season. 

I watched a couple of movies this weekend/evenings. The first one was Father Stu and I liked that one. Last night I watched The Lost City, which was ok and funny. I've always liked Sandra Bullock. But it was one of those movies where my streaming kept buffering and then their voices were getting offtrack with their lips. So annoying. It did seem to finally stop doing that part way through the movie.

Dh has a tv out in his shop that he streams his YouTube premium subscription through. I have a Firestick attached to the tv for the streaming. On Saturday it kept disconnecting from our wi-fi. I'm not sure what I did to get it working. I kept trying different things, unplugging, restarting our modem, etc. I had restarted the firestick and it still wasn't working and I was googling the problem on my phone and it suddenly reconnected. Then about 20 minutes later it disconnected again. Same thing, I have no idea what worked to connect it. I'm thinking something was glitchy with our internet service, as at that point I looked at my phone and instead of being on wi-fi it was on LTE. The hard part is not knowing what is/was causing it. If it's the Firestick itself wearing out, I can easily get a new one, but I don't want to buy another one if there is nothing wrong with it. I guess the only way to tell would be to bring the tv into the house and see if it keeps doing it. The firestick/tv in the house was working fine.

One evening last week my mom called me a couple of times about some "confirmation" she had from her (old) investment company. That was the evening she seemed extra confused and wasn't making much sense. Then she mentioned this confirmation (You are enrolled in e-delivery) again the next morning and I told her I'll look at it next visit. Well.....apparently she took papers out of her file cabinet and this is something from 2017! So, next trip I need to start bringing home the papers from her file cabinet, I guess. 

I tried a vanilla yogurt (Two Good) with only 2 grams of sugar, but after a few bites I wasn't liking it. So, back to my Activia vanilla yogurt that has too much sugar. 12 grams. Well, my store trip yesterday they substituted a lower calorie Activia vanilla yogurt that only has 6 grams of sugar. It's still not as good as the other one, LOL, but it's an ok compromise between the one that tastes best and the one kind with only 2 grams of sugar. I'll eat it. I'm also going to switch to the Carnation Instant Breakfast with artificial sweetener instead of sugar. I've used it before, years ago and the only reason at the time, I switched back to regular, was I was pinching every dime and there were less packets per box, at same cost. I drink this most mornings (if I'm not now having yogurt) so this will be a good way to cut down more sugar.

I made enchiladas for dinner last night, so we will have that for leftovers tonight. Makes Monday easy after working all day.  

Kitty is starting to extend his time sleeping with me when I go to bed at night. He made it until midnight last night. As long as I put the throw blanket he likes down next to me, he will lay down and sleep next to me awhile now.