Monday, November 25, 2019

To move or not to move

We got a skiff of snow over night. The weather report is showing more off and on today.

My mom called me yesterday afternoon. She still sounded good, but it was an interesting phone call. My DD lives about 90 miles from her. I think my mom has been to her house once, and that was early on when they first bought the house (3 years ago) and she and my uncle went up there for a visit. So, I'm sure by now my mom has forgotten that. Anyhow, she called me up and said "you know, for some reason I had been thinking DD lived really far away from me. I really don't know what I was thinking but I got to thinking about me having to move and move near her and I realized she lives in ___, and that's really not that far. I really don't see a point in me moving again, since she doesn't really live that far away (it's typically about 1 1/2-2 hour drive, DD made it in 90 minutes from her work). I really like living here. I guess I thought she was lots farther away so it would be easier for her, but she's really not that far away. I'm not sure exactly why I thought I need to move, really".

I said well, I agree. I think we should just wait and see a bit how it goes now that BF isn't living there. Lets see how you do getting into your own routine. I told her I really think that it's been her BF putting the idea into her head that she needs to move up near DD (and SB). She said, yes, I think you are right. I said I really don't think this is anything that needs to be decided immediately. You are fine there, for now, and we can keep watch on how you are doing with everything and it's no rush.

She agreed and said "plus, I know the people here, I wouldn't know anyone if I moved". Then she said "OH, I feel so much better now! I've just kept thinking about having to move again and I really don't want to yet, as long as I'm doing ok with everything. I'm so glad I called and talked to you about it!".

I messaged DD about it. I told her I wish they (BF and SB) would just leave her alone about moving! For fricks sake. Stop stressing her out. And even if she really did need to move, it's all certainly something we could start to get arranged on our own, without getting her stressed about it. I have a feeling that this is what a lot of today's visit by SB, taking her to see BF, is going to be about. I'm going to give her a call this evening, too, and see how it went. See what I can get out of her (which is hard, oftentimes due to her short term memory loss). I told DD, I'll bet this afternoon/evening and tomorrow she'll be back to not doing as well, as she usually seems to get after SB's "help".

I still don't know what is going on with BF and the death with dignity. The only thing she seems to know is that for some reason it's going to take longer than they thought. Which obviously it is, because if he had been able to get it approved, his 14 days would have been passed by now. I'm guessing maybe the dr's couldn't say he for sure has less than 6 months to live, which is part of the requirement to get approved.

We see our DS has a new girlfriend. This is someone he has known since he was a kid. So, at least he is finally with someone his own age, she doesn't have any kids and isn't/hasn't been a druggy. She's the sister of a friend of his. She has a job (asst. mgr of retail store), her own place, nice car, etc. Much improvement over these older, druggies, with kids, women he's been with the past 5 years.

8 comments:

  1. I thought your son was going to be a father. Was that a false alarm?Hope he will get his act together with this more stable woman.

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    1. that previous girlfriend (she was 39, with 2 kids) had a miscarriage (as did the girlfriend before that). Then it appears they broke up shortly after that. I'm really hoping he finds some stability in his life with this one.

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  2. I hope that your mom has a good visit with BF. Hopefully she will be able to update you on the goings on.

    As for DS, I hope this means something good for him, maybe it will inspire him to find a little stability as you say.

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    1. I'm hoping DS will have a good example in her, too.

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  3. I'm glad your mom realized that your daughter isn't all that far from her. I hope she'll be fine after her visit to her BF. Hope all is well with you, too.

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    1. I'm calling her later this morning to see how it went. Yesterday was a stressful work day, so I didn't call her last night (figured she was probably tired too)

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  4. It must be a tremendous relief to your mom not to think about having to move again. It would make me anxious too. And I'm glad your son is seeing someone more stable now - maybe he's finally getting his act together. I hope so!

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    1. She sounded extremely relieved. But then BF gets in her ear and keeps on about it :(

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