Thursday, January 29, 2015

Dorm drama

DD just started her second quarter of college, but has already had to start thinking about housing options for next year and it's been stressing her out a bit. She has one thing she knows for certain - she does not want to live in a dorm room! She has quickly realized she is a more private person and needs at least a small private space to unwind in. The other thing she knows is that current roommate is not on her choice of future roommates. While she is nice and friendly, she is impossible to talk with about much of substance because she is always right and will argue it until you either give up or agree with her. She also only studies about 1 hour a week, while DD studies several hours a day, especially on weekends and roommate isn't the quietest. She also has a sneaky way of making DD not included when she is doing something with the other 2 suite mates.

Their current dorm situation is they have "suite-mates"  - 2 other girls who have a dorm room on the other side and the 4 of them share a bathroom in the middle. They all get along and go back and forth between rooms, which also makes it harder for DD to study, though she does really like the other 2 girls. DD has found a nice spot in the library and she will also go to a coffee shop on the waterfront to study and enjoy the view. She is looking forward to this weekend when her roommate and suitemates will all be gone for the weekend and she'll have the place to herself :)

DD has a couple of classes with one of the suite mates and really likes her.  The suite mates have recently realized what DD's roommate has been doing to exclude DD so they are making sure DD gets included in the group texts, etc, about their dinner plans, etc. DD has a very good friend from home who has spent the past couple of months trying to decide if she was going to switch schools and go to DD's school.  If that were to happen then DD would definitely want to share a place with her.  Well, she finally decided this week that she is just going to stay at the local college she is at.

DD's roommate has gotten very close with another girl on their floor and it's been becoming apparent that they plan to room together next year (which DD was fine with, she doesn't want to room with her anyway) but DD had hoped she'd be able to room with K and S (the suit mates) in a rented place off campus, though she hadn't talked with them about the possibility yet. At dinner last night (with all of them) K & S told DD's roommate (and the other girl from their floor) that they were going to be sharing a place with another girl.  DD texted me that she found that out and now doesn't know what she is going to do - other than I guess find a studio apartment she can rent by herself.

Then her roommate took off to go do something with her friend and the suite mates came and talked to DD - the "other girl" they said they were to room with.......there isn't one.....but they want one and they hope it will be her! They were just trying to keep DD's roommate and her friend from asking to all share a place with them next year (because they don't want to live with her either, but don't want to hurt her feelings) so they said they already had a 3rd roommate to rent a place with. Once DD found that out she was much relieved to have this figured out.  They are going to an informational thing on campus tonight that gives them info on housing options, including living off campus.

I think a 3 bedroom apartment will be a much better living situation for DD - she can have her own space for some privacy when she wants/needs it, plus she can cook for herself - which she much prefers over campus dining food. She has her own car, so she can get to school and the town isn't that big - pretty much everything can be driven to in about 5 minutes.

Other than that and the hard classes - DD is loving her college life and the town. She has taken up running and has a favorite route along the waterfront to do her 2 mile jog. I messaged her last night that one of these Saturdays (or Sundays) she and I will have to meet up half way (about an hours drive to meet halfway) and do some shopping and have lunch. She was like YES YES YES! So we are going to do that a week from this coming Saturday.


15 comments:

  1. I remember housing stress during college ... things always seemed to come together in the end, but it's kind of hard/awkward to tell someone that you don't want to live with them!

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    1. yes, it's been awkward for all of them, but DD's roommate did finally tell her last night that she and the other girl were going to live together next year, so at least she told DD.

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  2. I paid extra to have a private room and was suite mates with the RA. So there were only 2 of us sharing the bathroom and RA was quiet. Just another option.

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    1. That was going to be one of DD's options, but guess it's hard to get into those rooms, so she still might have had to find a place of her own off campus.

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    1. I know! Especially since my DD isn't into drama and the little stunts roommate pulls.

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  4. This stuff is so much easier with boys. College Boy's situation is there are 2 in their suite but they have private bedrooms. CB is very private/introverted so we paid a bit extra for that situation rather than the suites were they share a bedroom too.
    Our Daughter her 1st yr. had a roommate who went off her meds and threatened to kill our daughter. The campus police did nothing so she had to call the state Attorney General and get him to call the College President. Yes, our Daughter those kind of balls....lolz

    I am glad things worked out well for your Daughter. Good luck on finding a 3 bedroom something that is affordable. 8-)

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    1. Eek! that must have been scary and very distracting from her studies. This is a "college town" and it sounds like there are quite a few apartments/old houses, etc that have been converted to have quite a few bedrooms for this type of college living situation, so hopefully they find something they like.

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  5. None of my kids want to stay in a dorm. They got experience from band trips, so they know what to expect. We are doing one or two years at junior college, then an apartment close to campus that rents out by the room. So each apartment has 3-4 rooms, a central living and kitchen, and small patio. Each person is only responsible for their portion of rent, not the others, so if one roommate just leaves, the other do not have to pick up their rent. Plus it includes all bills, except cell phone, yes, cable and Internet is included. $500 a month. It is quite nice.

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    1. That sounds like a perfect solution! I will have DD check to see if something like that is available around her college.

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  6. Room mate drama!! My kids only lasted one school year a piece with room mates .... after that, one kid got an apartment and two kids got single rooms within larger dorm apartments so that they were still sociable but had their own private space.

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    1. DD was so excited to move into the dorm.....but I had a feeling (knowing her) that she would end up not liking it very well. She likes to be sociable too, but on her own timeline - not 24/7 LOL

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  7. I lived in the dorms all 4 years but only shared a room for the first half of my freshman year and the first half of my sophomore year. I was able to get the room to myself after that both years. my last two years I was a RA so I automatically got a single room. I HATED sharing a room with a stranger. I realize that college dorms are usually shared to save space but it sucks. Glad your daughter won't have to share a bedroom again.

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  8. She is probably like me, part extrovert and part introvert. Too much excitement and I need a break by myself but too much time alone and i go crazy.

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    1. Exactly! I'm like that too. As long as I can have my by myself time I can handle other people LOL

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