I've been playing marriage counselor to my friend again. Ahhhhh!! She's been seeing a real counselor off an on....and she tells me what he advises her and it's exactly what I have told her! Hmmm...maybe I'm in the wrong profession. NO! I would go insane listening to people's problems all day, especially when you don't see them making any progress.
Friend did, a few days ago (at counselor's advice), take her cheating husband off her facebook. Like her counselor told her, why should he be allowed to have any insight into her life anymore? She still needs to file the divorce papers she filled out 2 months ago. The counselor and I both said, maybe actually having to sign them will be the wake up call he needs. But, she's still worried he will actually sign them. She doesn't talk to him very often anymore. Last time was 2 weeks ago (he was late paying her some of their bills) and when he does he is mean and rude to her.
I finally told her today, I'm sorry, but if this was me I would SO be over letting him treat me like this (it's been since mid summer). And just because she loves him still, doesn't mean he gets to treat her like this! She's sad, she's lonely, she's heartbroken. Of course she is, but at some point enough is enough. I told her it may not seem like it right now, but she can find happiness in her life again and she needs to. One baby step at a time. One step or decision leads to the next step towards happiness. Just hoping and wishing he changes back in the the husband she used to have isn't going to work. And most likely is not going to happen.
Thank God before all this happened she had gone back to school and got her 2 year degree and a full time administrative job, so at least she is able to support herself (though she may end up having to sell the house if they divorce).